Life is Messy!

Any perfectionists out there? It seems backwards, I know, but decluttering, editing, organizing and going through your s*** is NOT about being perfect! One of my mentors has said on many occasions, “Make your drawers look like GOD is coming to visit.” I love her dearly and have learned mountains of good stuff from her, but on this one, I respectfully have to disagree!

I have many clients, smart capable people, who are in “stuff up to their eyeballs” because they ARE perfectionists. They’re frozen, paralyzed, and have that wide-eyed, scared look. They believe that if their homes can’t be perfect and ready for “GOD to inspect” at any moment, then they can’t & won’t do it at all. It’s an all or nothing pattern that keeps us feeling stuck because (I know you know this) Nobody’s Perfect!

On all levels, life is messy and we humans just LOVE to muck around creating chaos all over the place! If you consider all of the items you own and all of the items that cross your threshold every day, every month and every year, there are thousands of decisions to make and many layers to consider, especially when it comes to your possessions. So, you may be wondering, if we’re not going for perfect, what are we going for then?

Let’s handle the chaos in your space and create a beautifully simple space that feels expansive and inviting without being perfect. Here’s how we’re going to do it:

1. Go for 80-90%  80-90% is very good, even excellent work! Especially in terms of your space. Choose to let go of the easy stuff first. It will still have a big effect on how you feel and it will give you the secret fuel to make your space (and you) feel amazing. PS: It will never be 100% finished. Just like the dishes and the laundry, there is always more to do.
   
   
2. Choose Ease. If you feel the pressure piling on, or feel you’re in “flight or fight” mode, then you’re edging beyond desire for “very good-excellent” and into perfectionism territory. You’ll know you’re really in the flow when you’re taking on your clutter, making progress, completing one area at a time without it feeling like a HUGE struggle. You’ll get winks from the Universe that will help you know you’re on the right track and in the flow:
   
   

I worked with a new client last month. We went through her files, and talked A LOT about productivity and incoming streams for her work. As we went through her files, though, there was a thick file of old emails from a past relationship, she had been saving them for 7 years as “evidence” of how awful things were. I asked her about them, and after some discussion she was ready to let them go...we shredded them (and cackled just a wee bit while we did it!) Hard to believe, I know, but she had a marriage proposal by the end of the week! When we’re really ready to let go, and create space, incredible, amazing things can happen.


     3.   Send your Gremlin to Time Out. There’s that voice in our heads that can be nasty. Sometimes I call it “The Gremlin”. It’s the voice of our fearful, insecure inner critic. If you’re not creating a space that’s flawless and polished then your Gremlin may be tempted to wage war. Instead of letting your Gremlins get the best of you, listen to your heart and know that you don’t need to be perfect!


     4.   Set Goals but Release Attachment to the Outcomes. This one is the hardest for me. I am an overachiever, with the occasional foray into perfectionism. So, I understand how hard this one can be. It’s one thing to set the goal of clearing out the basement, giving it the fresh coat of paint and turning it into a game room. It’s another to place your sense of value and worth on how much you achieve in a certain amount of time.

Instead, do the best you can (well, 80-90% of your best) and then let it go. Trust. Have faith. And lean into how good you will feel when you have let go of the stuff that does not serve you without sending yourself into a tailspin. Declutter and beautify as a gift for yourself and watch what happens!

Tons of Love,

XOXO,

Jane

PHOTO CREDIT: www.london-survival.com