Who's In Charge?
There’s often an internal scuffle that happens when you decide to cope with the chaos in your space. Brains! Emotions! Bodies! Heart and Spirit! They all have something to say in the matter, and they all have their place. But in the end, who’s in charge?
Ahhhh, the Brain!
Your (really smart and skillful) brain starts to give you a list of reasons to keep things. The list almost always goes something like this:
Or, Are Your Emotions Running the Show? If your emotions are front and center then you may be very sentimental about certain items in your space, especially heirlooms, gifts, or things you’ve held onto for a very long time already. Or you may feel “overwhelmed” and stuck. Be aware that emotions like to take center stage and they often show up with DRAMA and FLAIR!
Where Does the Clutter Live in Your Body? Is your office giving you a headache...tax time is coming up! Or does going into the chaotic basement or attic give you a backache or a stomachache? If you experience discomfort anywhere in your body when you think of your junk, or piles, or STUFF, release it into the world instead of carrying it (along with the accompanying aches and pains) into your future.
It’s. Just. Not. Worth. It.
How’s Your Personal Energy Account? I have a theory that we are all given a certain amount of energy to “spend” each day. And if every day you spend some of it in frustration or distress or pain over your stuff, wouldn’t you LOVE to have that energy back to spend however you please? What would you spend yours on? More giggles? More mischief? More winking at strangers, perhaps?
What Does Your Heart Want? Most of us are not used to slowing down enough to check in with our deepest desires. As our brains, emotions and bodies are giving us constant information, sometimes we forget to integrate all that information and ask…”What makes my spirit soar?” (I’m pretty sure it’s not 10 hammers scattered all over the garage or 200 back issue magazines in dusty piles.) If you take a deep breath and really sink into this deeper place, the decisions will be easier, you will be able to release items into the world with love so that YOU can live the life you truly want. I know it’s easier said than done, start slow, be gentle with yourself and practice.
You know the truth by how it feels...in your heart.
Contact me if you need support in your journey to SIMPLIFY. I would love to help you sort things out so that you can live a life you love!
Until next week!
PHOTO CREDIT: canstock.com
In a HUGE departure from the norm this weekend, we had friends over for dinner. The kind of friends who bring musical instruments and chocolate for dessert…We had a wonderful time eating, talking, playing music and singing.
It got me thinking...because when they left I felt so FULL, so SATISFIED and HAPPY!
And, I have guitar of my own, my husband and I both like to sing but we don’t (unless it’s day #3 on a hiking trip)…WHY?????
And we don’t go dancing very often either! (Swing Dance lessons already on the calendar for Feb.)
Of course, it made me think, what else are ALL OF US ignoring that could sustain us in ways we’ve forgotten?
Friends of mine just started a new Friday night GIRLS ONLY “thing” with wonderful food and conversation (Hi Jackie, Sally, Jamie...be there next week!). They are intentionally bringing their women friends together to infuse their home with more energy, love and laughter...to connect + raise the vibration of their home. Really! That’s what they said!
What are other simple things such as those that “feed” us in our daily lives?
This is my partial list...for me, some of them overlap, and I’m sure you could add a few:
Good food, Connecting with Nature, Family, and Friends, Purpose/Work, Fun (including singing and dance but that’s me!), Physical activity, Knowledge, Spirituality, Beauty, AND...
HOME, of course!
Shelter is a basic human need. I imagine the caveman days...and that cave dwellers cared about their homes, swept out the bones and bits of debris, made beautiful rock sculptures, put wildflowers on the table, drew on the walls to tell stories, make art. (If there are any Anthropologists out there who have resources for this, I’d be interested, my cursory search turned up nothing, so I surmised. :))
So, if our homes are to REALLY nourish us, reflect with me on a few essential ideas:
Become Aware: Just like I had a “moment” this weekend when I realized that playing and singing music could really fill me up in a way I had forgotten about, there are ways in which your home can feed your own personal energy, too. Do you feel in harmony with your home or does it drag you down? Do you smile as you’re driving home because of the joy and sustenance you know you’ll find waiting for you there? Or do you put your blinders on when you get home, because certain areas of your home make you feel anxious, depressed or tense?
Remove Stagnant Energy: One of the most powerful ways to lift the energy of your home is to remove all of the stagnant energy. Take away to a donation center anything that no longer serves you, anything that does not immediately lift your energy when you think of it or hold it in your hands. Anything broken or way beyond its expiration date also gets the boot. This includes all categories: books, papers, clothes, kitchen items, craft supplies, tubs and boxes and shelves in the basement, attic or garage. And remember to consider the STUFF in your storage locker (YOU might not have one, but I’ll bet you know someone who does!)
Make it Sparkle: Once you have eliminated the stuff that drags you down, consider ADDING elements to your space for even more vitality. Here are a few suggestions:
PS: If you enjoy the blog, please share with your friends, we LOVE watching our family grow!
Here’s your challenge:
Step away from the computer...time yourself, and go do one of the 9 items on the above list. And then, check in with us in the comments below. What did you do? How long did it take? AND...how do you feel?
Photo Credit: csp10164960
I hear this question from almost every client I work with! Even though the well-intentioned gift does NOT meet the criteria for the “KEEP” pile, the narrative goes something like this… “My Aunt Millie gave it to me!” “It was a gift from Grandmama!” “I can’t get rid of it, even though I hate it, my mom gave it to me!” (You get the idea…)
People have serious guilt about letting go of items that were gifts. And it’s not just at the holidays! It’s a whole category of “stuff” that stays in your space for the wrong reasons!
I am ALL for keeping gifts that make you exquisitely happy, and cause joy to flow from your pores. But any other gift? If you’re keeping it because of guilt? It’s got to go! Really!!!
My further thoughts :) on the subject…
The FIRST GIFT is the choosing. If you are inspired at the time of buying a gift for someone else then the first gift has been given. If it lights you up to purchase a gift, then by all means, DO IT!
The SECOND GIFT is the giving. The moment you send or deliver the gift, the second gift has been given. You’re really sending your love with the extra dollop of something tangible to represent it. YAY!
The THIRD GIFT is the receiving. “My (relative, friend, S.O., husband) thought so much of me that s/he gave me a gift! How lovely, I can feel the love, the intention, the spirit of the gift!” Receiving the love and intention is the third gift.
THEN...when the gift is in your hands, IT IS YOURS!
And, it is completely up to you what you decide to do with it.
IF, and only if, you shiver with delight when you hold whatever has been given to you...then it’s a keeper.
IF it falls into the other category, filled with reasons, rationalizations, and guilt, then you must send it out into the world WITH LOTS OF LOVE for someone else to adore.
Remember! The three gifts (choosing, giving and receiving) have already transpired!!!!!
It is OK for you to return, give, or donate that which does not serve you!
And I know this is not easy, I had a client last summer who had had her 60th birthday party months before...When I went to her house, the dozen or so gag gifts were in a pile on her living room floor, in front of the couch. She was really challenged with what to do about the situation. Well, you can imagine how it went...she was not wanting to keep them, but felt very obligated. We talked, deciding that really, they could go, the fun was over (long over) the party had happened, the laughs had been had, the memories were happy(!!!) and the actual physical gifts were NOT NECESSARY to keep!
So, if you’re hanging onto any “dud” gifts, please consider your own energy, health and happiness when deciding what to keep!
You are not a gift warehouse, and you do not have to save every gift that has been bestowed upon you!
And, I get it, it’s not always easy!
Give me a call if I can help support you to enjoy more space, more energy, and some elbow room for expansion.
Photo Credit: alphaspirit